JoeBlogs.

Excuses.

2010-05-28T01:33:00.002+01:00

Working fine.
Get on with it.

This is the world we live in.

2010-03-02T11:24:00.001Z

Standing at the bus stop is an experience i will always keep close to my heart. Although that might sound like an odd sentence to come out with, i really mean it.
When you have nothing to do but go wait for the bus 20mins early you can stop and take in whats happening around you.
My first observation was a chap aged around 45 or 50. He had greased back hair, an unkept goatee,a worn old leather jacket with a sheeps wool lining, black fingerless gloves and brilliant black lace shoes.
I then spotted he had his gyro bumpf poking out the top of his jacket pocket which threw me a bit.
I mean i dont know his situation but i presume he has just had a bad hand given to him in every aspect of life.
But it just made me think that the way i see the older generation is really deluded.
I dont know.
After i was finished observing that man an eldery lady fell prey to my thoughts. Not to the same extent, but still enough to make me want to write about her.
She was a well kept woman whom i imagined living in a nice detatched somewhere peaceful like conan bridge.
Marks and sparks bag full of the usual epic goodies you would get if you went there.
This not only added to my hurt for the other chap but gave me hope of how i plan my elderly life to be.
She then growled out a foul cough and had to spit into a tissue after stubbing out the last of her malbro gold.
To finish my stint at the bus stop i turned around to see that it was next to a bookies.
Nothing beats the smell of stale alcohol and broken hopes and dreams at 10am.
Happy 18th tasha :)

ooochyawhooreyeh.

2009-12-26T03:33:00.002Z

I have totally been out of this whole blog thing. I just cant keep it up and be interested in it like I am with my tumblr page.
but fuck it.
ALOT of people have been coming to me and saying "i have always wanted to do a blog and the only reason i havent done one is because i know people wont care what i write."
but, why does making a blog mean you have to advertise it. if you have always had the idea and wanted to do one then just do it. but keep it to yourself. you fanny(s).
hah.
PUUUUUUUUUUUUHEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, OUT.

Twibbon.

2009-11-20T07:50:00.001Z

you twitter right? Thought so.
Add this twibbon in support of the good old Goatee. :D

2months.

2009-11-16T06:22:00.002Z

Its been two whole months since i last did one of these.

Crikey.

A lot has been going on.

Since Sept 17th i have finished a hard summer at Fiddler's, celebrated 3years with Kirsty in Edinburgh, been enthralled in the much anticipated Modern Warfare 2, heard some good new beats,ate zebra,drank some very good whisky,spent good time with both my friends and mrs and a lot more in between.

I cant believe that it is only 6 or so weeks till Chrismukkah.

Crazy times.

it was new years eve that i started writing these and even though i havent stuck to doing it everyday, i am happy how it has turned out.

Just now i am currently applying for a job in town as an office junior.

It will be a 9-5 monday-friday which is like heaven compared to what i was doing before.

But i am loving not working right now.

Although right now i havent gotten out of my pyjamas in a day and not washed since saturday so it has pros and cons. But hey, its sunday right?

wtf.

2009-09-17T01:18:00.002+01:00

Sometimes..

sometimes i just need: a wank.

somtimes i want: nothing more than to sit on a plate of jelly.

somtimes i like to: video myself doing karate.

sometimes all it takes: is some words of encouragement.

somtimes i picture: my cat being the same size as me.

sometimes i wish: i could rewind time.

sometimes i find: turd on my ceiling.

sometimes i take: cocaine.

sometimes i look: good.

sometimes i hate: death.

sometimes it’s nice: to know you.

sometimes it hurts: when i pee.

sometimes it makes me happy:when i wake up an hour before my alarm.

sometimes it’s sad: when people don't laugh at my jokes.

sometimes i listen: to people.

sometimes i sleep:..only sometimes.

sometimes i like to watch: other people have sex.

sometimes i feel: cramp of the guch area.

sometimes i rant: over nothing.

sometimes i never: learn.

sometimes i really: cant stand some people.

When I’m ..

sad, i want: blown.

happy, i need: meat.

mad, i wish: i would turn red.

overjoyed, i find: it goes as fast as it came.

indifferent, i like to: know that either way is fine.

content, i never: think about kirsty pooping.

frustrated, all it takes: is nothing in my wank bank for me to be annoyed.

If..

you saw your best friend on one side of the road, but you also saw one of your close family members on the other side, and they were both in serious danger, who would you go to help first? what a gay question. family obv, but some friends are as good as family.

you had the choice of going back in time to or go forward in time to see the future, which would you choose? go back. i like surprises.

jesus was standing right infront of you, what would you say to him? i wish i was as famous as you. the last supper looked a blast and i always thought you were white.

Continuing fae the one before.

2009-09-17T00:41:00.003+01:00

1.)What is your name? Joe Douglas.

2.) Do you find it annoying when surveys ask for your name? sort of.

3.) What do you plan to buy in the future? hopefully a mac or a new tattoo.

4.) Where did you get the underwear you are currently wearing? nae underwear init.

5.) How many pairs of Converse do you own? none right now.

6.) Who is your favorite “That ’70s Show” character? the indian.

7.) There is a mummy standing behind you. What do you do? realize that there is no way in high hell that it is real so put down the mushies.

8.) What do you think of Miley Cyrus? hannah bandana? id cum on her face but thats it.

9.) Do you tend to think that you are always right? yes.

10.) Top Five Favorite Songs: The Running man-Aereogramme. Islands in the stream- Feist cover. Black Cherry-Goldfrapp. Malmo-The Album Leaf. The Fear-Lilly Allen(Duke Dumont remix)

11.) What was your favorite toy as a child? tonka.

12.) Have you thought more about your funeral, or your wedding? yea :S

13.) Dinosaurs or Unicorns? Unicorns defos.

14.) What is your favorite musical? West side story if i had to choose.

15.) You need new jeans. Where do you go? Zara i guess.

16.) Do you play the Sims 2? Nope.

17.) Do you think Harry Potter is at all immoral to read? Excuse me?

18.) What do you think of Maroon 5? production wise they are very good but not my cuppa.

19.) What about Coldplay? Guff. although diskotech do a nice remix of viva forever or whatever it is called.

20.) Fall Out Boy? i used to like them but again not my cuppa.

21.) Katy Perry? not my cuppa.

22.) How about The All-American Rejects? not my cuppa.

23.) Have you ever snuck into an R-rated movie when you weren’t old enough to see it without parents? possibly? i got into an 18 when i was like 15 or some shit.

24.) The Wii or Xbox 360? 360 ftw

25.) Team Demi/Selena or Team Miley? excuse me?

26.) Do you know many Emily’s? i know one and know off 2 more.

27.) What do you think of the Jonas Brothers? anal beads.

28.) Have you ever slept in a tent, indoors or out? yep outdoors.

29.) What is your favorite kind of Girlscout cookie? i dont know but on friends they talk about "thin mints". they sound ace.

30.) Do you enjoy surveys? i think i do yeah.

31.) What do you hear at the moment? nothing.

32.) Why do you think so many people love myspace? not so loved anymore. fb is the place.

33.) What do you think of people who do illegal drugs?depends on how they treat the drugs.

34.) Do you watch the Olympics? nope.

35.) What are your top five favorite stores? urban outfitters,topman,zara,h&m and that will do.

36.) Do you like the new Weezer album? nae heard it.

37.) What did you think of Panic at the Disco taking out the exclamation point in their name? didnt know they had done but it sounds like that they have built a big enough following to not have such an eye catching name and now they want to be taken seriously as a band and not a fag end emo band. so they will try to make some more mature music and lose a few followers but they dont care because they are making music" the way they have always wanted to". LOL.

38.) What is the worst job you have ever had? doing leaflets for the shop.

39.) Have you ever been to Minnesota? nah.

40.) What is the strangest thing you’ve ever seen on TV? wogans total recall. he just isnt funny.

41.) Do you watch informercials when there is nothing on? i used to. hah.

42.) What is your favorite Disney Show? show? i dont have one. film is lion king. or lady and the tramp.

43.) Have you ever seen the Wedding Singer? i havent actually.

44.) Top five reasons people rank things: that question confuses me.

45.) Have you ever gone camping? almost certain i answered this already. god, really scraping the barrell now.

46.) What do you miss most about elementary school? no worries.

47.) What do you do when you want to fill out a survey, but none of your friends have posted surveys that you have not taken yet? well this is the first time i have ever actually hunted for one.

48.) What is your favorite kind of DQ Blizzard? yeah...

49.) Has anything funny ever happened to you while in Wendy’s? no but i got hit on by a buffty in the D's.

50.) What is your current job? If you are applying anywhere, where?current job is a various mix of roles.

2009-09-17T00:20:00.004+01:00

1. how are you? i have been a whoorna lot better.

2. who was the last person you hugged? kirsty.

3. look to your left, what do you see?monitor, xbox and picture of marilyn monroe.

4. where do you like to be the most? in my bed curled up.

5. whats your fave film? mysterious skin or any other joseph gordon-levitt film.

6. what does the last person you commented on myspace mean to you?not too sure who it is.

7. what did you last laugh about? stuart coming to my window and telling me about his xbox headache.

8. where was your default took? laaaaandan.

9. whats the first thing you look for in a girl/guy? ability to make me laugh.

10. if your still in school, whats your fave lesson? i aint but it was music.

11. what do you work as / want to work as? i work as a barman/waiter/commis chef.

12. do you play video games? if so, which is your fave game? COD4.

13. who never fails to make you laugh? Martha.

14. what are you listening to right now? whirring hard drive.

15. who did you last have a sleepover with? kirsty.

16. i bet you miss someone, who?! Uncle mark.

17. are you happy with your life right now? i guess so.

18. why did you last get upset? unnesessary fight.

19. who was the last person you texted? kirsty.

20. who do you live with? maw.

21. do you like living with them? ofcoarse.

22. whats your mood right now on myspace? fooookeeen chuffers.

24. did you realise that there was no 23? nope.

25. what does your profile song mean to you? i can't think what it is.

26. who did you last shout at and why?can't remember.

27. are you normally a happy person? i would like to think so.

28. what was the last thing you went to see in the movies and with who? sorority row with kirsty.

29. whats your fave food? meat.

30. are you in love? i am but sometimes you wouldn't think it.

31. do you remember how you was 3 years ago? i was at that fantastic stage at the beggining of a relationship and still at school.

32. if so, does it make you cringe? oh looks wise, god yeah. but it was a nice little life.

33. if you could be with someone right now, who would it be?kirsty.

34. do you have any blogs on your myspace? no, i have this instead.

35. whats your fave thing in your room? my new set up and the fairy lights.

36. is this quiz boring you? no, im sad that its ending. its like having company.

37. if you had one wish, what would you wish for? lots of money to do good things with.

38. when was the last time you lied? i told a boy on xbox that i raped his dog tonight.

39. are your lips chapped? not right now no.

40. any last words? lets salvage while we still can? Please.

The fiddlers way.

2009-09-10T01:25:00.003+01:00

So it was another late night at fiddler's.

Around 12 i got off and it left me feeling very comforted.

I take the place for granted really. Working 7days in a row this week and similar hours for the past wee while have made me just totally zone out of the real world.

But tonight, even though it was the cause of my late finish, i couldn't help at smile at a group of people, all from different places. A large man from Florida who wore a kilt, two guys from Manchester and a couple from another part of England.

While they were eating they sat in completely different areas of the restaurant but somehow all got to talking and then inevitably started drinking.

The American was talking about how he has travelled all around the world and never had a better stay than his current one here in Drum.

Then he ended up talking about how it is so easy to judge a race of people e.g. we dislike Spanish because they are always the ones who come for dinner at around 8:55pm just as we are about to close.

But he said that he went to Russia and hung out with some guys from the army and couldn't believe how similar they were to us.

"When it comes down to it, everyone is the same. We all want the same shit out of life, essentially, and people should realize that."

He said that and everyone around the bar stopped in silence for a moment and thought about it and realised that it is so true.

Then, one of the blokes piped up and said "Aye, the Germans were like that too, i found i really got on with them. They bombed our chippy, but still a nice bunch".

Everyone erupted with laughter and broke the sentiment of the American but it was good.

But this sort of thing happens almost every night and i have never really stopped to think about it before.

I guess any place is like that but whisky does wonderful things init.

Shit the bed.

2009-08-25T00:14:00.003+01:00

So games weekend was pretty mental.

Friday night resulted in drinking lots at the lewiston which then led to various acts including ; trying to drink a pint with no hands, thumb wars and getting martha or elle to pull rob cameron for comepleting a rubix cube in a minute!

None of those things i suceeded at but was still whooooorna fun.

Then i managed to get myself home. Only to discover Hannah and Darroch had followed me back.

Which ended in them putting me to bed but naked and being asked by myelf to stay and keep me company.

Bahahahaa.

The hangover killed me though and saturday night was a bit of a let down. But ended with me and ailsa coming back to mine for some drinks and good beats.

Other than that I have been pretty packed with work as usual. But it is all good. Hearing about sweden has made me want to go back and i have been invited by some friends over there to come over. So i reckon after fiddlers closes it's a wee trip over me thinks.

But somewhere different. They all seem to want to go to gothenburg so maybe that is my destination.

Nothing else good to report.

Stole Of Megan :P(we are cool for still doing these right?)

2009-08-17T23:22:00.002+01:00

How many texts are in your inbox

God knows, iPhone stores EVERY text.

When did your last hug take place?
Probably at work. Linnhe had a hard day.

Who was the last person you talked to?
Dazza.

Whats the first text in your inbox say?

Hi folks, i'm playing an acoustic thing in hoots tomorrow night. If you happen to be around then i'm on at 11ish. Cheers, angus.

When was the last time you smiled?

Tonight at the pub.

Does anyone like you as more than a friend?
Hope so :P

Who was the first person you talked to today?

Linnhe at work.

Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?
Kirsty.

What are you NOT looking forward to?
9-5 shift tomorrow.

Are you a forgiving person?
depends.

What is something you really want right now?
A Blowjob.

Haha, jokes.

I really want to go to bed and finish listening to Ricky Gervais' new audiobook.

How many TRUE friends do you have?
A few.

How late did you stay up last night and why?
2am. Mixing.

If you could move somewhere else, would you?
Hell yes.

Do you prefer to call or text?
I like to call but i don't get the time too.

Who took your profile picture?

A photographer in london.

What is your ring tone?
Ellie Gouldings' remix of "Sleepyhead"

When is the next time you will hug someone?
Hopefully tomorrow.

Are you wearing anything on your feet right now?
Nope.

What are you eating?
Nothing. I might go make a snack.

Who was the last person you texted?
Kirsty

First person under J on your cell phone?
James Coupe.

Do you hate that person?
No.

Do you have any fun plans for tomorrow?
Work, then not one but two dinners!

What's your longest relationship?

Current one. 2years 10months.

Do you know anyone whose name starts with a Z?
Yah.

Zarina.

Who was the last person to smoke a cigarette in your presence?
Can't remember.

Is there anyone that you care more about than yourself?

Aye.

How old is the first person on your top?
17

What does your last sent text say?
:: x

Are you crazy?

As a person sometimes.

Mentally, I'm practically a lunatic.

What was the last thing you drank?
Pint of Brewdog Physics.

Are you happy right now?
I'm not unhappty.

What did you do today?
Worked. Went for a pint. Home.

Do you like to smile?
Ofcoarse.

Do you still turn to your parents for advice or comfort?
Occasionally.

Have you ever been in a difficult relationship?
Arent all relationships difficult at times?

How old will you be on your next birthday?

20 :S

Where is one place that you'd like to visit?
Bali.

Who's the last person of the opposite sex you hugged?
Linnhe.

What sport do you watch the most?
Formula 1/Football/UFC

Would you ever consider piercing your lip?
I had it done but then left that scene.

Do you know anyone with the same name as you?
Aye :)

What was the worst mistake of your life?
Pooping my pants right before the toilet.

Did you know anybody that has committed suicide?
Yes.

Who do you go to for advice the most?
I don't ever really ask for advice.

I guess Linnhe or Karen at work.

God my life is sad.

What's the worst thing to happen to you today?
My clothes smelt funny when they came out of the wash,

Is there a certain person that makes you feel safe?
Not safe. Because i know if a gang of hooligans were to come at us, she couldn't do much.

But i feel safe when it is just us i guess.

How many people do you 100% trust?
3 or four.

Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?
He is practically my brother.

What do you think of guys who have girlfriends but let other girls wear their hoodies?
It depends on where they wear it. Around the house i get. But in public is so needy and attention seeking. It's like they want people to comment on it. Fuck off.

If someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?
I always like to know. Even though nothing would ever happen.

Do you hate the last girl you were texting?

No.

What are you listening to?
The whir of my hard disk actually.

God, thats not like me.

Wheres the tunes.

Did you ever lose a best friend?
Ive lost touch of one of my oldest.

But none have died or anything.

Do you use smiley faces on the computer a lot?

I guess i do yeah.

Last phonecall was from?
Darroch i think.

Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?
Aye.

Have you ever made out in a public bathroom?
Not a public Bathroom ;)

If you could go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?
Try better at school. How cliche is that!?

Did you ever sleep in the same bed with a member of the opposite sex?
Not once :P

Talking to anyone online right now?
Nut.

Five hours ago, were you touching a person of the opposite sex?
Haha what a wierd question.

No i was at work.

Is there a difference between love and in love?

Obv.

Do you have a brother?
Yeah :D

Have you ever kissed anyone whose name started with an C?
Aye.

When you take a drink of something, do you hold your pinky up?
Possibly. Depends on the drink. :L

Do you get along with girls?
I reckon so.

Is there anyone who doesn't like you?
Oh god yes.

Do you laugh a lot?
Work is pretty much a LOL fest.

Have you ever kissed someone that was high?
No no no no.

Was your last text from a boy or a girl?
Girl.

Who was the last person to touch your butt?
John Beach! HAHAHA, right in front of customers.

Do you think it's bad to have sex at your age?
Excuse me?

Have you ever wished to live a day of life in the opposite sex?
All that goes through my mind.

Would it bother you if your best friend got naked at a beach or river?

Noway, i'd join them!

What is your favorite thing about the beach?
Making footprints.

What is the first URL you usually type in when logging on to the Web

I have hotlinks. :P

Last place you went out to eat?

A place in Newcastle, Ireland.

Have you ever kissed anyone whose name started with a J?
Yas.

If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?
Depends on how they treated it.

Have you ever hugged someone for over a minute?
Yah.

Would you ever get a tattoo on your collar bone?
Got one init :)

Do you check your texts right away when you receive them?

If im working probably not.

Not even funny.

2009-08-16T00:12:00.005+01:00

This year has fucking flown by.

Am I the only one who thinks this?

It only seems like a month or 2 ago that my uncle came for a visit.

It is only 2months till mine and Kirsty's 3year anniversary!

It is only when you stop to think about it you realize what a mental length that is.

The best part is, is that i still have the same feelings for her now, than when i did when we met.

So it is never a struggle.

I wish i could revert back to how i used to do blogs.

They were fun to write. Just now i am only writting to get it down. Almost a release of anything that's inside that i want to say.

This is my Cat called Mouse :)

She only listens to Kings Of Convenience - "I Don't Know What I Can Save You From"

Comatosed.

2009-08-09T23:58:00.002+01:00

Well it has been a significant time since i was on here last.
Other than work, i have not really been up to much.
Since Ireland I went out in town for a few hours after work one night, which was decent.
Got a kingrib from maxx's as per.
I got a bmx that works and totally loving cycling everywhere.
I got home from a fucking epic Belladrum festival this afternoon.
Highlights were :Twin Atlantic, Unicorn Kid, Top Loaders one good song,The Dance Mansion, Passing out on the Saturday @around 7 after drinking 2 bottles of Morgans in 6hrs, then waking up thinking it was only like 10pm but it was actually half 5am on Sunday :L
Epic win.
Now it is back to normality.
But this time I have nothing to look forward to.
Drum games will be good I guess.
Fiddler's Krew are gonna be hitting the sesh hard after hours so look out Drum.
I got a dock for my iPhone which is pretty sweet.
I shall post another blog right now from my iPhone whilst i remember actually.

Casa De Douglean.

2009-07-20T23:56:00.003+01:00

So that is my week at Kirsty's over with :(
It went far too fast and would like to rewind time to do it all over again.
We baked cakes/walked the doggies/got drunk/slept/bathed/cycled together.
It made work so much better too.
Coming home to some beer and your lady friend is a good feeling.
Considerably better than coming home to a computer and loneliness.
I don't really know what else to say about it other than I loved it and i love her. :)
On to other things,
First being, i got my week at work shortened to 5 days! Chchchchuffers.
Which means that i get a day to pack for my ace trip to Ireland with herself. :D
It will be brill being just the two of us alone away from everything here for a whole week!
I don't think we have ever had that.
PLUS
I found out that while we are over there Taking Back Sunday are playing with Twin Atlantic in Belfast so I am praying we will make it.
Also, i got my conformation of my spot at Napier Uni in Edinburgh next year.
I actually can't wait.
Goodbye Highlands.
So yeah, this week has been excellent.
Adieu.

Alan Partridge.

2009-07-09T01:09:00.005+01:00

Watching "Knowing Me, Knowing You.". Mental this shit was out in 1994 or something.

Well delighted right now.
Just finished a week at work so now i have two days off to spend with herself.
I move into her parent free house tomorrow for a week and a half!
Ace.


Why has the text gone odd?
Oh well.
I bought myself a new camera :D
Nikon coolpix(gay name right?) L100.
It is pretty sweet.



Best Times.

I am going to start releasing some music shit that I have been working on soon so keep your eyes open for anything.
Stay PPPPPPhresh.

Splendid and tremendous.

2009-06-30T22:38:00.003+01:00

Pocket Alan is the best app in the world.
Tonight was a nice night.
Went for dinner at the Ben, then a very short walk before heading back to Kirsty's to chill.
Now I am in my P.J's and looking at getting an early night.
So, the story around my new layout is that i wanted to do a piss take on all this pretentious art that is going around. So the original plan was to do the multiple zig zags in a variety of colours then write "Look, I'm an artist too" somewhere near it.
Then eventually post it on sites.
But then I got to finishing the zig zags and thought "wait, this could look pretty sweet as an actual header for the page". So i did that instead.
Back to work tomorrow :(
So i can only presume that means a lovely weekend at work for the fourth consecutive weekend.
Chuffers.
This weather is a total nightmare.
I can't believe i have the nerve to whinge about the heat but this is just ridiculous.
Betty Swallocks.
Good night all.

New layout.

2009-06-30T03:02:00.003+01:00

Got a new layout.
Don't know why i decided to change it.
Just got a smidge bored.
Andrew Murray won the Tennis today which means he is now into the quarter finals. :D
Ireland for the Mrs and I is coming up quick and fast.
We got a cheeky wee grand stowed away saved so it shall be gooooood times yo :P
I need new shoes so bad right now.
Invermess has a dyer selection but will chance my luck tomorrow.
Yea, so this was just a quick one really.
Oh! 2 more things.
Firstly, i got my statement and shit in for Uni so now it is just a waiting game to find out if I get in for next year now , or whether i will have to wait till Christmas to apply.
Fingers crossed.
Secondly, 90210!
Holy Christ.
Worst possible way to end the series but also the most good way to end.
EVERYONE IS IN THE SHIT AND IT IS GREAT!

Dilema.

2009-06-26T01:00:00.003+01:00

I have a decision to make and it is not an easy one.
I want university next year.
I have been accepted for a course at a university for this year.
I have no clue as to what needs organized as far as university goes.
Appartments, money, work etc..
The biggest ultimatum i face is my relationship.
Next year was supposed to be our year together but now it has ruined the concept by shoving an acceptance for this year in my face.
Next year, the course is uncertain and that is the clincher.
I don't think i have ever had to think so much in my life.
Please don't be angry.

Youchoobe.

2009-06-25T00:05:00.002+01:00

So, i was on YouTube today and i was really struggling to find anything new that i haven't seen.
But i failed.
So I have decided to make a short list of YouTube videos that I have LOL'D,ROFL'D,PMSL'D,LMFAO'D @.
So here are a few of my faves:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R24fyrs6ofo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bhcA4Ry65FU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4yk-ESYl7Bc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7sUkA-daQi8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWTYyx6PLZY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ByTMLjtYacg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7oGx2dImE8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6WHRxXY67UA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l_8yPap-k_s
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTqsV3q7rRU
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=THfiHQZVSw0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dYlckOkcLsY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lugUd7fIx8Q
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eeO7COzVWnk

I am sure there are soo many that i missed out on, but i think i got the majority of them.

Stuffed pasta.

2009-06-23T02:52:00.004+01:00

It is around 3am right now and I have attempted to go to sleep but it just is not happening.
Today, the weather has been a right wee trickster.
Visually, it has been very grey and dull but that is deceptive as the temperature has been average with a very humid after effect.
Consequently, I am struggling to sleep and this should not be so.

I am currently browsing for a new camera.
I don't want to fall into the trap of getting a digital camera for the simple fact that i get my money's worth.
I would like to really get something worth while.
If anyone understands what I mean then can you give me some ideas on where to look.
I am almost certain my Pyjama bottoms make me have nightmares.

Life.

2009-06-20T02:29:00.003+01:00

So right now I am pretty happy.
I have been E-mailing a tutor at Napier University and he is optimistic about my entry there.
Which may not sound to important but for me, this is a big deal.
I was never a straight A student so to hear of a spot at Napier is music to my ears.
I have waited for my excellent lady to finish her time in school then off we go to Edinburgh to start the next phase of our lives :S
Pretty scary stuff but also it's the most exciting news in the world.
Drumnadrochit is not for me, I'm afraid.
I am in a pattern just now of looking ahead to my days off, so the days i do work are almost a blur.
I just focus on the good and make the bad seem less.
I got used to seeing Kirsty everyday and currently, that just isn't possible.
It has taken me a while to adjust and I have been a cunt at times but it is only because i miss her.
If all goes to plan i will get to spend a night with her tomorrow which will be super.
I love my life.

New Msn.

2009-06-18T23:18:00.004+01:00

So, it has been a large amount of time since i was on here last.
I feel as though I have hit a wall in terms of writing these, which is gumpf.
I liked having the enthusiasm to do one everyday, but now, not only is it impossible to do so, but i don't actually have anything to say.
I don't know how i managed to keep it up for so long.
I mean, i wasn't working but that certainly never meant i was doing anything more creative than what i get up to now.
Quite the contrary actually.
I am just going to talk about three things which are ; Shopping, iPhone and Music.

As far as shopping, it's pretty dire. Me and Kirsty have been in for the late night shopping on Thursdays for a couple weeks in a row and each time i leave with either nothing or something which i immediately regret.
Even Zara is utter bukkake right now and don't even get me started on H&M and Topman.
So today, Kirsty and I went into borders, had a butchers, decided there was nothing worth buying other than a good writing pen and sat in Starbucks.
On the way out, something grabbed my eye and was totally WOW'd by it. It was a speaker system for iPods and shit with a subwoofer built in for like £60.
The first thought that went through my mind was "This will be immense for camping parties".
So i bought it with no hesitation.
It took me till the bus ride home to realize that it is powered through a mains plug so it won't be portable like i had first thought.
So that is a perfect example of me just being bored with money on a time limit.
It is a horrible combo.
As for my iPhone.
I was waiting for a new update on it which was announced in march which allows the iPhone to do many things, one being MMS.
So i installed it the minute it was released, forgetting that i am actually running my iPhone illegally and without the right firmware, i cannot use it for normal phone purposes.
But all will be well in a couple of days when the firmware is released.
On to Music now and all I have to say is that i can't believe how much my taste has changed in the last year. For instance, a my playlist that i have on almost all the time right now is titled " Foot Stompeeeeeeeen" and it consists off a variety of Genres including Dub Step, Dance, House, Electronica etc.
I guess it's good to have a wide variety.
The following can fuck off though: Black Eyed Peas.
P.s. iamcalledjoe@hotmail.co.uk

Capitals.

2009-05-28T00:08:00.002+01:00

A new project from a friend and his mate.
Have a listen.
"Coastlines" is epic.
I can't stop listening to it.
Go visit there site :

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=474933278

Good.

2009-05-26T10:24:00.002+01:00

Sitting in the window seat of starbucks on the comfy seats listening to Bon Iver drinking a venti vanilla frappuccino and eating caramel wafers after just buying new man smell and in ear headphones for le iPhone.
Me and Kirsty are off to ireland mid July.
Can't wait.

-- Post Fae Le iPhone.

Golly gosh.

2009-05-20T23:43:00.002+01:00

It has been almost a darn week since i last did one of these.
That should mean that i have heaps to say but truthfully i don't.
45hr week doesn't seem that much but i am pretty effing tired.
Me n Kirst have been swaying between a holiday in Cyprus or staying closer to home and booking a cottage for a week.
Have to see how work is planned out.
I have been still listening to loads of music, new and old.
Right now i have been listen to things like "Bon Iver" and "Daniel Dixon" but then i always go back to "Union of Knives". for some reason.
"Violence and Birdsong" is top.
Been right in the mood for a nice cold pint but i have no friends :(
Going to see my Dad, Olivia and Logan tomorrow which will be nice.
A day off before the mad weekend starts.
Stooooooopid bank holidays.
I had a wee gathering at mine last weekend.
Went as good as an unplanned party at mine could of gone.
So yeah.
I think i might stop this soon.
I know no one cares about this post and i guess i care if you do or not but i think i'll just save this page for when something substantial comes around so keep checking folks. :)

iSteam.

2009-05-14T00:45:00.000+01:00

Sweet app.
Tomorrow my day shall consist of taking my iPod to the shinty field with a crate of beer and getting drunk in the sun.
Cannae wait.
If you wish to join me just gimme a buzz.

-- Post From My iPhone.

Drumnadrochit.

2009-05-12T00:47:00.001+01:00

It's not such a bad place.

-- Post From My iPhone

FOTC.

2009-05-10T15:58:00.005+01:00

So i have only got one episode of flight of the conchords season 2 left to watch.
Well half of it.
It has past my expectations and has proved to be very similar to the first, which lets face it, is what we all wanted.
Also, with the first season being such a success they have blatantly made alot of money and the quality of the effects has been raised.
Which I did expect anyway.
Bringing the Hollywood lifestyle a bit closer to home, Sean William-Scott (aka Stiffler) was in Drumnadrochit yesterday!
How mental is that.

Here is a Picture of Dawn with him.

I'm sure she would want this picture broad casted so i don't feel bad for exploiting.

Fucking christ.

2009-05-05T17:39:00.001+01:00

Went with Joph and Dazza to the aquadome today.
But i tried to push my swimming skills to the next level and actually do a stroke of some sort and not just doggy paddle :S
This proved too much and i am whooorna shattered.
But it was good.
Went to the Tattoo parlour and as soon as i smelt the inside of the shop i just wanted another one.
I am mulling over a few ideas in my mind and when i am happy with it i am gonna get it.

Effing hilare.

2009-05-03T23:51:00.004+01:00

Okay, so who remembers that "Phones4U" advert that was on years ago with the two guys in a VW campervan, singing a made up song about the phone shop "Phones4U".
The lyrics go something like:
"Phones..For you, for less, at Phones4U. Everybody get into a wind canoe, and row on down to Phones4u, I'm talking to my friends at an alien zoo, a ming ming minga minga minga mingooo..."

Wellll anyway,
The two guys in the commercial are non other than Brett Mackenzie and Jemaine Clement from Flight of the Conchords!?!?!?!?!
I am still in shock after finding this out.
Catch it on YouTube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MAzSLgUxT6M

Pwnd.

2009-05-03T10:52:00.001+01:00

Ricky "the hitman" Hatton lost his fight last night in las vegas.
I may have already said this but did you know that more people have died in boxing using the padded gloves than when they fought bare knuckle.
This is because punching a skull hurt the puncher as much as the...punchee. So they went for stomach blows instead.
Everyday is a school day.
-- Post Fae Le iPhone.

Ahahaha.

2009-04-30T23:42:00.002+01:00

Right so how many people have been in this situation.
You are sitting chatting away with your mate or whoever and whilst you are gabbing away a man/woman with something noticeably wrong with them ( e.g. a lazy eye or one arm) enters the room and you say to your friend "Okay, don't look now but there is a man with the most disgusting stump of an arm sitting at the bar".
This, of coarse translates as "Okay, be the most obvious person ever and make up a lousy excuse for you to stare e.g. drop a piece of paper or something"
Haha, please tell me other people do this?
And it's like everyone does the same thing though. They shape their mouths like women do when putting on mascara and then turn their head round soooooooo slowly.
Maybe i am way off about this but i have have noticed this a lot recently.
I'm going to watch bbt.

Sore heed still.

2009-04-29T11:53:00.002+01:00

Just an update really.
I have now been informed that i fell on my face on the smidy road.
Literally the road.
A woman walked past and thought i was a badger but after a closer inspection realized it was me.
Then Pauline Goldie's dad stayed with me until the ambulance the lady phoned arrived and that's the long and short of it.
Woke up in a backless robe with only my boxers on, in a hospital bed with a drip in my arm.
Good times.
So yeah,
My topman order still hasn't arrived, even though i paid a extra fiver to get it on special delivery.
Better arrive soon.
Downloaded a film of 40d, cant remember the name but it looks pretty scary.
I really want MacDonald's chips and a strawberry milkshake.

Sore heeed.

2009-04-28T18:20:00.002+01:00

This is the view i awoke to.
It is also the view that ward 4A in the raigmore hospital has.
I cant remember a thing other than i drank alot of tequila.
Thank you to whoever found me lying unconscious and got me to hospital.

-- Post Fae Le iPhone.

Sleeveless.

2009-04-27T00:28:00.004+01:00

New Layout (y)
So i finally have a nice 2days off which means i am up late and i have time to do a proper blog.
I feel i have been rushing these lately and i don't like it.
I want to be able to come back to this page in years to come and enjoy reading it.
So whats been happening in my world?
Not an awful lot tbh.
That's not to say i am having a shit time, far from it in fact.
But work has taken over anything which doesn't leave me with alot of free time.
I hung out with Stuart again for the first time in what felt like a decade, but it was ace.
COD5 till 5am.
WE WILL PRESTIGE!
:L
Then a nice night in with Kirst, which included Jager shots, white wine, wife beater and effing jalepeno crisps to accompany good tunes and candlelight :)
Aside from that malarkey i have added many apps to the iPhone. But in all honesty im starting to get annoyed with it.
As I'm not on o2 and have unlocked it, i don't get 3g in drum, so whenever i go into town, my phone gets confused and just decides it cant be bothered to be nice.
So it cuts off any reception even when i get back to drum.
It will resolve itself in a day, so if you get a call of my land line, that is why.
I just ordered a gorge new cardi that I've been trying to find fooooooor ages, (not the zara one Kirsty) and i found a pair of geek specs at last too which will hopefully fit better than other pairs i have tried.
So they should be here for Tuesday.
The other day, I was walking to work with Kirsty and as we got to the junction at the big park, there as an old man and his wife getting out of their car, but as the old guy got out he went to get something from one of those luggage things you put on the roof and fucking farted for a good 3secs which is a long fart when you think about it, but christ it took all my will power to not burst out laughing. So me n Kirst just looked away and cried, making it seem more obvious that we were laughing at him.
So yeah, right now i am sitting at my laptop in my blink sleeveless coz i iz old skool init.

Chchchazza

2009-04-25T05:23:00.002+01:00

Here is a dog.
Lol.
Charliiiiie :)
Reasons i like him: he is cute at this moment in time...
....that is all.

-- Post Fae Le iPhone.

Another week.

2009-04-22T23:58:00.002+01:00

Well that is another week at work down,
Nice wee pay packet to look forward to.
I should start to save but i like to shop so we shall see.
Day of sat so i reckon a party friday night somewhere.
If anyone knows of anything gimmie a holla on bebo,myspace, msn etc..

BBC 3

2009-04-21T23:06:00.002+01:00

I just seen the
new advert for BBC 3. It was hilarious. It had Douglas from the it crowd so it was only going to be a LOL.
Anyway, this is my cat.
She is called Mouse :)

-- Post Fae Le iPhone.

If i could be anyone.

2009-04-20T23:52:00.001+01:00

It would defos be one of these guys.
Don't ask me why, i just love there style and the vibe i get from their body language in the photo.
I talked to my bff, Stuart, tonight and he told me i should do a picture a day thing seeing as i can upload straight from my phone.
So i will try and see how it goes.
Sorry for the lack of blog.
Between 12hr shifts at work and my iPhone i don't have much time.
But i shall get my finger oot.
Still well happy with life.
Its guid.
-- Post Fae Le iPhone.

Happy.

2009-04-16T01:28:00.001+01:00

I am really happy right now. It is a mixture of different things but it is the first time in a long time that i have been able to say that and mean it.
Me sleep now.
-- Post Fae Le iPhone.

Alan Carr.

2009-04-15T00:57:00.002+01:00

I follow him on twitter and this is an entry i came across :

Just been on JLC's chatshow and he bought me a Wii, the one with the yoga that Louise Redknapp advertises. Goodbye backboobs.

Hahaha,
Fucking legend.
I feel pregnant, i crave a certain someone :(

First one.

2009-04-14T12:10:00.000+01:00

So this is my first post via my iPhone. It is pretty gosh darn handy.
It gives me the option to add a picture from my phone memory or it opens up the camera so i can snap something there and then.
Not on till 5 the day so i have had a nice lie in.
Think i will watch top gear on iPlayer and then 90210.

-- Post Fae Le iPhone.

Good times.

2009-04-13T23:51:00.005+01:00

Went to see Kirsty after the first split of work was over.
Trampolines are epic.

I Love You.

iPhone-arama.

2009-04-13T16:48:00.002+01:00

Sorry for the lack of bloggage.
As you might have guessed i have been engrossed in my new iPhone and all i can say that as much as people may slag the shit out of any apple product, it is a fantastic piece of kit.
There is something new i found out about it everyday which is great.
But that's not to say it is perfect.
A few niggles bother me but the pros outweigh the cons.
Majorly.

Half time.

2009-04-10T17:33:00.002+01:00

1st phase of split shift is over and done with.
Came to Kirsty's for tea and now she is gone and I'm here alone just watching friends.
As you can tell by my blogs recently I am farrrrrr too excited about getting my iPhone tomorrow, but now it is only one more sleep and i can barely contain myself.
No doubt there will be a full review once i get it.
:)

also if you have twitter, follow me on:

http://www.twitter.com/iamcalledjoe

Goodbye viewty.

2009-04-09T23:24:00.002+01:00

Yes it is now time to part ways with the LG Viewty.
This is my last day with it and i am quite saddened to see it go.
Bought for £330 in Jan 2008 and sold to a mate for £50 quid.
But its successor(thank you gorge ::), the iPhone, will be sufficient.
Also, just a quick shoutout to :

http://meganrachelblogs.blogspot.com/

and

http://liamfraser.blogspot.com/

These guys have very different blogs, but equally enjoyable :)

P.s. 11hr shift is over and I'm FOOOOKED!

100th post.

2009-04-08T14:21:00.002+01:00

This is my 100th post :D
If anyone was keen and noticed this, i have left a note for everyone.
I have bolded a letter in every post from the beginning, and it should spell out a message.
However, i did make an error and a letter is missing, but i only noticed this when i got to like 92.
So, go back to my first post and note down each bolded letter and see what it spells, it will look like a jumble but if you have the patience to decode it it will work.
But when you get to the 29th of Jan, add an "o" to it.
I look forward to hearing what you have come up with.
Thanks for reading :)

Bond,James Bond.

2009-04-07T01:50:00.002+01:00

So i watched the new Bond flick "Quantum Solero" or something like that, and i have to hand it to them, they know what makes a great action film.
The first seen is a mental car chase with guns and explosions and shit and i was glued.
I literally went to set my alarm on my phone as the film was starting and by the end the phone was still in my hand, with an unset alarm.
I LOL'D at myself.
This week is going soo slow :(
I wish i could just fall asleep and wake up on Saturday.
But no, I have to wait and just soldier on knowing that my iPhone is just sitting there, waiting for me to free it.
Grrrr.

If only.

2009-04-06T00:43:00.003+01:00

I wish i could organize something like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jwMj3PJDxuo

Its called a Flash Mob and I am so going to organize one to do at falcon square.
Its easy enough to do so long as there is a large crowd, a guideline of what to do and a camera man.
It is so simple but ace.

No energy.

2009-04-05T21:11:00.004+01:00

I need to eat.
I am so lazy when no one is here.
All I've eaten is a bowl of soup at work then a B&T Pot Noodle.
Think Ill make a casserole in a bit.
Once Kirsty's mins have expired on her Hotel credit.
I apologise for boring blogs recently, I am coming up to my 100th blog post and i reckon i might ease of doing them everyday.
Unless ofcoarse you like to listen to my ramblings.
Then i shall continue, jut for you.
Yea...jut.
:)

Rain.

2009-04-04T23:15:00.003+01:00

Just as the good weather kicks in it starts to rain like a mother effer.
Typical Scottish weather.
I wish it would just make it's mind up.
It has just occurred to me that I was playing Lady Gaga at a party last night on a guitar.
Ahahahahaha.
Semi times.
"I bust more nuts than a pistachio junkie"
Working tomorrow morning which means that I am going to miss the grand prix.
Raging.
But on another note it is the Easter holidays for anyone at Uni which means I am seeing some good mates who I haven't seen in ages. :)

Sunnnnnnayyyyyy!

2009-04-03T18:13:00.003+01:00

I effing love how sunny it is right now.
I went to town with Kirsty today and after a walk round the shops, we walked along the riverside and onto whin park and lay on the grass for an hour or so.
I hope it stays like this.
P.s. iPhone is reserved.
:D

Work.

2009-04-02T22:55:00.003+01:00

Back to work.
Fiddler's have opended properly again now so i had my first night tonight.
It was excellent.
Forgot how much bant i get there.
Good times.
Anyways,
After all the hype i gave the 1000th show of Deal or no Deal, it turned out to be poor.
There was 2 quarter million boxes yet she decided to walk at 50k which i guess is hard to turn down but if i was her i reckon i would of gone all the way.
Tonight i am going to watch big bang theory season two as i hear it is a LOL.
So yea.

:D:D:D:D

2009-04-01T03:04:00.003+01:00

Tuesday the 31st of March 2009 will be a day i will always remember for this reason.
I WON THE EFFING LOTTERY!!
CHECKED MY TICKET FROM SATURDAY NIGHTS DRAW AND GOT 5NUMBERS.
THAT'S £235,000!!!!!!!!
ONLY JOKING! HAPPY APRIL FOOLS EVERYONE!

E,e,e,e ecstasy.

2009-03-31T17:46:00.004+01:00

I have a beer stained keyboard right now, i am hoping with all the typing that i do that it will just go away over time.
I am almost certain that i am going to be sucker and pay almost £400 to get an iPhone.
I reckon i can justify it though.
First reason being my current phone is going a bit dodge and sometimes people aren't getting my texts, and secondly, i have a 1st gen iPod shuffle which can hold 10 songs max so if i was to buy a phone and an mp3 player with an equivalent capacity of 16gb, i would be just as well to get the iPhone as it has many more features.
And it means only one thing in the pocket. (y)
In other news it is the 1000th show of deal or no deal tomorrow and i hope its exciting.

Fookeeen whaaaaaaaaa!

2009-03-30T14:17:00.003+01:00

It is back to me I'm afraid.
I reckon that that is quite a good thing to do though.
Anytime i am at someones house i will log into my blogger account and they can write a story on my page.
(y)
So anyways, i was having breakfast this morning and i fancied Weet-a-bix.
So i got my bowl out and the milk and sugar(Because you cant eat them without sugar) but then i remembered why i don't have Weet-a-bix very often.
Ans it is because that whenever i have them i always need to have 2 or 3. But because of the way the bowl bevels up the are on their sides, so that means that i either have them half dry and half in the milk or have them drowning in milk which i don't like.
So what i am trying to say is that in order for me to be happy with a bowl of Weet-a-bix i have to use a casserole dish to eat them out off.
Bad times.

Growing Old (The Night I slept with Joe)

2009-03-29T23:45:00.005+01:00

yes it happens to the best off us..... Hi I'm Stuart Moffat and I've taken over Joe's Blogs for the night..... myself and Joe are just back from seeing The XCerts playing on a boat on the middle of loch ness... choppy? I hear you ask, nah it was ok thanks.

anyway I want to tell you about the time myself and joe slept in my bed, now before any of you get carried away this is not the story of a sexual nature, this is a mear 2 friends sharing 1 bed.... It began with myself and joe being asked to help load in the Gear at the Ironworks venue for a band called The Wombat. Myself and Joe needed money and love the wombats so we said yes, that night we decided we would both stay at mine so we could just get up early and leave for work!. so were asleep in my bed and I waken slightly rubbing joe's hand, but since I'm not used to being in bed with joe I think to myself, what the heck am I doing?, and I look at joe and see its joe, then I turn on my side (facing away from joe) and say out loud, sorry Joe I was just rubbing your hand..... then when we woke we rushed off to work, later that day joe reminded me about how I was rubbing his hand and how I said in such a cool calm voice "sorry joe i was just rubbing your hand" like it was the normal thing to do and we both burst out laughing. anyway i guess its much funnier if you are me or joe, but seriously I will always remember that now that its written down here. never let me forget. stuart moffat x

Aww never.

2009-03-28T04:00:00.003Z

Firstly i would like to point out that i missed yesterdays.
I never realised that when i was writing it, i hadn't gone past midnight so it still counted as Thursdays one.
Nugget.
Secondly, OMG, Heroes Season Two was Immense!
It did end really poor but i guess that it is just a build up to the third season.
But seriously, Tim Kring is a legend and i have no idea how him and the rest of the crew came up with the plot lines of the show. It is always good when you can't predict how things will go and for me, Heroes does that.
But then again maybe I am just slow.
:S
T-55mins till Formula 1 season gets under way.
Woop.
Can't wait for tonight girl.
;)

Greed.

2009-03-26T23:44:00.004Z

What a horrible thing it is to have inside you.
As far as i can remember i have never been greedy.
I have been possessive and ambitious at times but not greedy.

You know what?
I just wrote out a big speech on Deal or no Deal and then realized that no one cares or values what i write so i deleted it.
So yea, greed is bad. If you have it you get so greedy that it comes to the point where people hate you for it or you become too greedy and lose out big time and end up hating yourself.
Money is such a fucking cunt.
It is what every ones lives are based around.
You go to school, college or uni to hopefully reach a level of education which will raise you to a higher level of employment that will earn you a high salary.
It is all about quality of life.
A life that is aesthetically pleasing but really cold and hollow inside, or a life that's mediocre but leaves you feeling content is the two options, in my opinion, that the people of today seem to take on.
I can't say which i would prefer because as much as i would like to sound very humble and go for the latter, I wouldn't turn my nose up to a Swiss chalet in the mountains and a Porsche in the driveway.
The only way i would like a life like that though was if it was paid for there and then.
No higher purchase or credit or mortgages because none of it is really yours until you have paid it off.
It's all just a facade to make someone that is dull and ordinary into someone that is extra-ordinary.
Isn't it though?
Or am I just sounding like an utter smeg right now?
Tbh, i don't care.
I just spent an evening with who i guess you would call the "celebrities" of Inverness. Caley players. And they just think they are too cool for fucking school. Driving around in 60k cars thinking they are Christiano Ronaldo of Man U, when really they are Christopher Ronald from ManUwishYouWereAsGoodAsChristianoRonaldoOfManU.
It's Inverness for christ sake. Those 60k cars will be paid of in 3 years time and then they will get another car on Credit and pay that off in another 3years time. It's not really your car in my opinion.
...
I think it is time for this incessant rant to end so i will go change my tampon.
Sorry for being moody.

Heroes.

2009-03-26T03:38:00.004Z

I just watched the first disc of "Heroes" season two.
It is off to a good start however i already know that it is going to end shit.
So i have been told anyway.
We shall see.
My new wee cousin is called Brodie Alexander Douglas. or B.A.D.
Haha!
How ace is that.
What a strong name that is.
It's excellent.
:D
Oh and on the 24th of April i shall be cruising to Aberdeen to see ERRORS!!!!!!!!!!
I am frickin so excited.
I have waited for another tour of theirs for ages and it has come.
Check them out btw @ http://www.myspace.com/weareerrors
If you think they are shite, well, you are wrong and clearly don't appreciate genius when you hear it.
Next to Martin Scott of Aereogramme, James Hamilton of Errors is my idol as far as drumming is concerned. You cant appreciate it on the albums, but live, he is nothing short of spectacular.
Anyways its around 4am and i prob should get some sleep.
Deal or no Deal first though.

BeEmEx.

2009-03-25T17:28:00.004Z

So i have acquired Shaun's bmx while he is away.
I think i have fixed the back tyre but still doesn't feel quite right.
But its excellent to have a bike again.
I have another fashion show tomorrow at Drumosie house.
I can't wait. I'm passed the stage of nervousness now and just enjoy it.
:)
I have also dreamt about having an iPhone now for the last 3nights and there is nothing worse than the feeling of waking up after a really good dream and then realizing it's not happened.
Well, there are worse things but you know what i mean.
Today is also the start of the countdown to the 1000th show of Deal Or No Deal. A week today is the big one so its supposed to be exciting.

Bitter sweet.

2009-03-24T01:36:00.003Z

Today is an odd one.
March 24th 1999 my uncle Mark died.
I was only eight at the time and, as much as i loved him, i never really got a chance to develop a relationship with him.
It's shit.
From my own experiences, my dads stories and all his other friends stories, i can only generate immense pictures of him. He served in the army, played guitar, drove an Audi quatrro and of coarse had a little liking for motorcycles ;)
You can't get more cool than that.
So yeah, ten years down the line and i can only hope that he is proud of me and knows that i miss him.
But on a more positive note my Uncle Marti text me not 10mins ago informing me that his fiance Sherie has given birth to a healthy baby boy :)
Another Douglas in the family! :D
So congratulations guys, we are so happy for you all.

Like a fish mate.

2009-03-23T18:20:00.003Z

Gutted.
Not only has it started torrential rain but i just found out that a legend walked through the street of my sordid little village.
Saturday was a bad enough day.
Scotland lost to England in the rugby and effing FRANKMUSIK started his "Live and Lost" trip.
I will never get over this.
He is an utter genius and i could of spent a half hour or more with him if I just checked Myspace then.
THE ONE DAY I DECIDE NOT TO GO ON TO IT SOMETHING LIKE THAT HAPPENS!!!!!
Typical.
Anyway, 90210 tonight.
Happy Monday all.

Why not "Son and Daughter" day?

2009-03-22T11:33:00.005Z

So it is Sunday.
Happy Mothers Day.
Weekend has actually been really good :D
Seen my mates and got drunk with them.
Good times.
I'm gonna miss Shaun.
He leaves today and heads of for an audition.
Fingers crossed boy.
Friday night was pretty mental. Shaun, Jodi, Smelz Allanah and I all went on a crawl and then ended back at mine for some chooooooooooooooons n bevaaaaaaays.
Then all Saturday I had nothing better to do than watch all 3 games of the rugby.
England cheated their way to a victory but never mind.
Then at night i babysat with Kirsty.
Felt like an age since we seen each other so it was nice.
Still scowering e-bay/amazon/hotukdeals etc.. for iPhones. :(
Oh and Jade Goodie died in the early hours of this morning.
I was gonna make a joke but I won't. All i'll say is that the punchline is a play on "slumdog millionaire" and "Some dog with no hair" but it would be terrible for me to utter it so I'm not going to.
R.I.P.

TFIF.

2009-03-20T03:19:00.003Z

I am just in the door for what can only be described as a very fun night.
A visit to the Ben with my brother from another mother, Shaun, who very kindly paid for all the drink.
Many pints of cider and lager and shots of tequila and sambuca in between.
Good mixture.
Then at closing time the only thing left to do was wonder up the rock which took a golden age as Shaun showed that his move to the city has cost him his fitness.
Lazy arse.
Nevertheless we arrived at the top after about 40mins of hiking and as we were just settling Shaun spewed his ringer.
Good times.
Then it took some legendary orienteering skills from myself to guide us back down the hill.
So all in all a fun night.
I am about to put on skins.
Then maybe Deal or No Deal.

Hustler baybay.

2009-03-19T01:35:00.003Z

Oh my stars its been a hell of a ride in the ol' poker!
I started the match at around $76K then got myself up to $80K, but got too greedy and went down to $60K, got up to $80K again then back down to $65K but then my last hand with a flush to King got me up to $90K!
I am happy.
Only ten thousand away fae getting a number 6 next to my name.
Representing $100K, Obv.
I was gonna write about how i am disappointed that i missed tonight's lottery as it is my first ever time, but instead I'm gonna go check on teletext thenoo...
Yeah I'm almost certain i never won.
If i was looking at the right numbers i couldn't have been more away from winning.
Ach well, it was exciting.
Gotta be init to win it.
Init.
I'm gonna watch Deal or no Deal.
Wannafightaboutit?

4overdose.

2009-03-18T15:55:00.005Z

I just watched that animation film "Bolt".
Not impressed.
A few moments where a chuckle was uttered but other than that, a bit of a disappointment.
There will never be an animation film like Monsters Inc. again.
I'm so sleepy right now but I know if I nap i will be up till a ridiculous time again.
Bad times.
Listened to "Union of Knives" again last night and I always forget how much of an epic album "Violence and Birdsong" is.
I recommend it.
4od is starting to annoy me right now.
If it doesn't stop being a NoOb i will uninstall.

iPhonedyermaw.

2009-03-17T14:41:00.004Z

I can't believe this time next year I will be just about to turn 20!
How crazy is that!?
It is so old.
I can't get away with being a tool or immature.
Right now my cover is that "I'm a teenager, I'm supposed to be a fanny".
I guess that just means I will have to cram as much fart and boob jokes as i can into this next year as a nineteen year old.
Haha,
Nah but seriously, if anyone has a spare £400, want to buy me a 16gb white iPhone?
That would be great.
Lol.
How much do I want to go on Deal or No Deal btw!?
They put you up in a hotel until your game comes around and then chances are your gonna leave with a nice wee sum of money.
Unless you are greedy like the guy yesterday who ended up leaving with 1p.
Gutted.
Tuesday today which means Shameless is on.
I hope Monica has left for good.

Star$.

2009-03-16T16:43:00.005Z

I'm almost convinced the reason why they call it "StarBucks" is because of how effing expensive it is.
I rarely venture in but today i passed the window and spied Frances and Stephanie :D
So i popped to say hello and had a good wee chin wag about everything.
The best part of it though was the fact that Stephanie had a dream about "Subway" as in the sandwich joint.
I NEVER have dreams about that!?
Also she pointed out how "Starfucks" have moved there little trolley with vanilla sprinkles, chocolate sprinkles, stirrers, milk, etc... next to where you collect your coffee from which then blocks of the path to the sofas next to the window which means you have to walk all the way back around.
FUMEEEEN!
Anyway, its Monday which means 90210 tonight.
Adrianna better die soon.

Sunday.

2009-03-15T18:13:00.006Z

I watched the film "Twilight" last night to see what all the fuss was about and i have to say it wasn't half bad.
Minus some poor acting by the lassie who played Bella, it was a very watchable flick.
With the aid of my expert gf, i was filled in to all the details.
After Kirsty left, i did a few things around the house then sat down to watch Celtic pwn Rangers.
Get it up yaes!
Then I watched the WRC and Loeb got the win in that, surprise surprise.
Other than that I've done eff all today.
I wish i had a Video Camera too muck around with.
I want to get into editing and stuff like that.
So yeah...nothing exciting to report today I'm afraid guys.

Happy Birthday Beautiful.

2009-03-14T01:25:00.005Z

So me and my compadre, Kirsty, potentially saved a mans life tonight.
As we were walking home, a man stopped in his car and asked if either of us had a phone because he just drove past a man lying on the road and thought an ambulance was in order.
So after telling the man we would check it out, we walked along the road a bit and loandbehold there the man was. He got to his feet and we had to hold up to stop him from falling over...again.
After around ten minutes of rambling and slurring a lift was organized and we got him back to his house safe and sound.
Don't thank us, just pay it forward :P
So anyways, it is Saturday the 14th of march which means it is ma bbz bday :) Dinner tonight then back to mine for a game of scrabble ;)
Skins was utter gumpf last night.
They are just not getting it right atall.
Total 1890's bathing moment with effy naked, crying in a bath and her mother pouring water over her head using a jug.
What fucking family does that.
Blatant attempt at making the show seem arty and pretentious when really all we want to see are teenagers fucking and taking drugs.
Just about to a hear track of the new Theatrefall demo.
V. excited.
I will write about it when i listen to it.
....
That was EYE-mense.
"And we're not changing!"
Scotland game tomorrow.
Should be a guid'un.

P.s. Happy Birthday Ben Hosie (aka Golden) Hahaha

I want to be famous.

2009-03-13T01:21:00.004Z

That's another fashion show i can add to my collection.
Everything went so well, and i am so excited for my next one at Drumosie House with the Caley Lads!
But i have to say that the best part of this whole thing is getting to know my superiors.
I advertise their clothes, they love me in return.
Yesterday i got given a 1st edition Joey.D jacket worth £126 which i laaaaaaaaav :)
Then after the show tonight they convinced me to come back to beauly with them and my fellow models, and what a night it was.
All drinks were on them and their company was superb.
After a lochend camping trip i wasn't keen on tequila slammers but Michael the bell end forced me to and i must say I'm a dab hand at it now.
Defos the best craic i have had in a loooong time.
Cant wait till the 26th now!
And to top it all off, they payed for my taxi home.
Oh how i live mingling with the tycoons of the highlands <3

It's tricky to rock a rhyme, to rock a rhyme on time.

2009-03-12T02:11:00.004Z

It was one of those days when it's a minute away from snowing and there is this electricity in the air.
You can almost hear it right?
And this bag was just dancing with me, like a little kid begging me to play with it for fifteen minutes.
That's the day i realized that there was this entire life behind things, and this incredibly benevolent force that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid.
Ever.
There is so much beauty in the world.

This is some words from the film American Beauty.
I beg you to go and watch it.
Anyway...
I can't remember how old i was when i found out that Stephen Gately from Boyzone was gay.
I was so not shocked by it though.
What shocked me more was the fact that the rest of them are straight.
I mean come on, Ronan Keating?
He's in the closet so much he is practically in Narnia.

Twitter=Shit...ter.

2009-03-11T00:16:00.004Z

So its early Wednesday morning but i want to write this before i forget it because i found it funny.
I love people who when you are telling a story, they try and change your opinion on it.
For example.
Say I started a convo about a song or a film but hadn't said what i thought about it yet, but as I start talking about it the person will share their opinion first and be like "Aww it's good isn't it?".
But while they say this they nod.
As if to try and convince me.
Haha.
You know what i mean though!?
They nod and say it's good to me like its going to change my mind so I'd say "Yea you are right, it is good. Before you said anything i was gonna say it was utter gash but your expert skills have made me think otherwise."
I hope that made sense.
:(
Twitter....not a fan.

Gorge day.

2009-03-10T16:49:00.006Z

What a lovely bright day it is here in the highlands of Scotland.
Its good not having condensation on your windows.
Effing double glazing my arse.
The song on here now is by a guy called "Owl City" and the song is "Fuzzy Blue Lights".
Its what i like to call "wheniwas16music" for the simple reason that its the sort of music i listened to when i was 16. It has got a kind of sad but cheery vibe. If that makes sense. Like the postal service. I rarely listen to them anymore which is a shame.
So yeah, you will either think this song is shit or it's nice.
I don't know why i like it.
On other news, i got a call today from a designer who has booked me into not one, but TWO fashion shows.
I shall be modelling aside some Inverness Caley players.
Booyah.

A few things you can do to help me.

2009-03-09T20:34:00.004Z

Bookmark this page for instant access to me.
Thanks a bunch and sorry the post have been utter
gumpf recently.
Keep reading.

Oh flo rida, flo rida oh.

2009-03-08T19:55:00.004Z

If you are going to do a cover of a song, don't copy someone who's lips resemble Oprah Winfrey's quim.

P.s.

2009-03-07T15:07:00.003Z

This is just something that i worked on a while ago.
The two songs I have mashed together are : Faith No More - Midlife Crisis + Chemical Brothers-Morning Lemon.

You can times it a thousand.

2009-03-07T08:06:00.005Z

Just a quick one today.
Theatrefall are currently in Glasgow recording new material as a very different band to what they were mid 2008.
I've been lucky enough to hear rough demos and recordings and i must say i am excited to hear what they have to offer in the coming months.
So keep an eye out folks.
Catch them on everything thats hip :

http://www.myspace.com/theatrefall

http://www.bebo.com/theatrefall

http://www.twitter.com/theatrefall

Fcuk.

2009-03-06T00:36:00.005Z

Today was an odd one.
Never got to sleep till half past 6 am, then i was to get up at half seven, only to wake up and fall asleep again.
I got the 1 o'clock bus in to town which is an experience i will always keep close to my heart.
Purely for the observation aspect.
It is where you see the funniest of people.
I love to just watch the way people act.
Not in like a stalkerish way, just pick up on any habits.
There was a big boned gal sitting on the other side of the bus facing me.
Firstly, there were huners of seats left, why choose the one that's fucking going backwards.
But that's not even the start.
Like a ninja, she pulls a jumbo sausage roll out off thin air. I'm convinced it was tucked under up her sleeve.
She went to town on that badboy, with no thought what so ever that people might be watching her. Hah.
Then to top it off she pulls out a crumpled tissue, puts it on her finger. (like you would to make a wee pretend ghostie). Slowly guides it up her nose, does a couple of anti clockwise swivels, then clockwise, then anti clockwise....etc.
Can't wait for my next venture to town.
P.s. I'm in love with Sharon Horgan. I cant believe she is almost 40!
Catch her in the t.v shows "Pulling" and "Free Agents".

Casino.

2009-03-05T01:29:00.006Z

Does anyone ever get when you go out with your ipod on and as your favourite tune at that time comes on, you spy someone walking in your direction that you cant blank but also know that they will come talk to you.
Why is it ALWAYS as your getting into the song that this happens.
So you have two options.
Number one, you come to the person, but want to save the song so you take out your Mp3 player and hit pause, but in doing so letting the other person know that you really don't want to stand and chat and therefore coming across as a cunt. Then to speed it along, you pull out the phone or mp3 which should hopefully tell the guy you do not wana be there. But once the moment is over you can hit play and enjoy the choooooooooooooonz.
Or number two, take out your headphones but still let the song play, making it very nonchalant(but really you are screaming at the person in your mind), talk to the person. But then when you are finished you realize the song is over and now the interest is gone. But not giving of the cock vibe.
It is a dilemma i face alot. I wish i cared more to go for the latter option.
I just watched Casino.
It was almost 3hrs long.
It is not in my top ten.

Wehearawurlitzer.

2009-03-04T01:28:00.006Z

This is a new alias i have come up with for any songs i write.
Acoustic guitar or on the lappy.
I know the name is kind of...shit.
It's all one word and stuff like that but I don't really care.
I like it.
Anyways, i might link you guys to a page with some creations when I have made a few.
If that's not an incentive to come back and read, I don't know what is.

Semi Pro.

2009-03-03T04:09:00.004Z

Definitely Will Ferrell's worst film.
In fact the title "Semi Pro" is perfectly suited.
It really is semi professional.
Major let down.
Anyway...
Since the news broke out that Blink-182 reformed, i have been forcing myself to try and get back into their stuff. But, when it comes to it i can never listen to anything younger than "Take of Your Pants and Jacket".
Maybe as the year goes on and the tour comes ever closer i will delve into their early stuff again.
Also, I think i am willing to share some comedy greats that i kept to myself for a year or so now.
Alot of people know about them now but it was mothers day last year that i discovered "Barratts and Beretta".
So next time you are on YouTube, search for "Completely uncalled for" or "Mother's day".
2 of their best.

Boomtown Rats.

2009-03-02T05:18:00.004Z

It is Monday today.
It is also the 2nd of March!
I can't believe how fast this year has gone.
It is half past five in the morning and I'm thinking about hitting the hay soon.
But i have been kept occupied.
You will notice a snazzy new picture for my blog and also i managed to find a way to get the song i want on my page but without making the navbar come down half the friggin way.
So I feel like its a well spent night tbh.
I think i will go to town later.
Spend more money that i really don't have.

Who else like subtlety?

2009-03-01T02:16:00.007Z

I'm going to use this title again because i feel like it is appropriate.
I mean come on.
Pretty much the lamest thing ever and very insulting.

On to far better things, or maybe just onto more mature things.
I am starting to see this whole nocturnal malarkey as a bit of a downfall.
It ruins alot of things.
One of them being, what should have been a nice stay at a certain someones house.
So I apologize.

Hyperbole police.

2009-02-28T03:44:00.007Z

There was something like 1000 cases of these toads blowing up spontaneously and it turned out that crows had figured out the precise location of the toads liver and in one clean swoop they would fly down, peck out the liver, and as an act of self defence the toad would puff out, but the pressure they puffed out at was so immense that they secreted their intestines and other organs and from an onlookers perspective it would seem as if they were blowing up.
Hah,
So yea i was gonna write about how I'm sick of hearing the phrases "cheeky wee" and "pretty much". As in "might go for a cheeky wee vodka" and "pretty much hate them right now" or whatever.
I'm such a culprit for doing it but I'm trying to stop because its pretty much the gayest reference ever and I'm noticing more and more bellends starting to use it.
But i wont go into it, don't want people thinking I'm a cunt...
lol.

Superb.

2009-02-27T04:12:00.004Z

Whether this makes me like Inverness anymore, i don't know. All I do know is, is that this is an amazing photograph.
I stumbled across it by accident.
According to the site i found it from it was taken in march 2004 which means that it is nearly 5years old!
Crazy.
It's quite nostalgic to me for a few reasons.
The first being that it has "the factory" sign in it.
I loathed this shop but i reckon in 2004 it was probably the only clothes shop i entered.
Secondly it has Woolworths in it. Need i say more?
And lastly, even though Inverness was officially named a city in 2001, this photo still gives a very "towny" vibe.
It is desolate.
There are only a few people around and they are just minding their own business.
In contrast, if you were to take a photograph from the same position today, the atmosphere of the photo would be far more frantic and I don't think it would stand out like this one did.
So the next time you are walking through Barron Taylor Street, think of this photo and I guarantee that you will understand what i mean.

Oysters.

2009-02-26T08:39:00.004Z

I am almost certain that this is the earliest i have risen in a good 2months.
Its coming up to nine o clock in the morning and im awake for the rest of the day.
Usually, i would be getting to my 3rd hour of sleep.
I amnt quite sure what i will do today.
Town at 4ish, but till then drum is my oyster.
Granted its a small oyster, with shit on it, and inside aint the usual aphrodisiac that is the oyster.
No, infact i reckon that Drumnadrochit has probably the exact opposite effect.
It repulses me, it really does.
Inside the small shit covered oyster is a severed leg.
I want to fast forward my life right now.

This photograph is proof.

2009-02-25T18:10:00.005Z

I wish i had film for my polaroid camera! ):
I got my polaroid in the summer and i took it to one party, got a few crackers. But it has just been lying there, unused since.
It is sooo expensive to maintain though. Like £20 for a pack of 10 photos :S
But they look amazing.
If anyone has spare film that they dont need or want, or know of any deals on film please let me know :)
Anyone going to little boots on friday?

Odd.

2009-02-24T05:46:00.004Z

Today (yesterday technically) contained such a spectrum of emotions.
After a terrible experience on the bus, which resulted in me sprinting for an appointment i had to meet, from Charleston School, all the way down to the canal, over the bridge, along the road with pc world and lidl, down to aldi, cross the lights, down to the river ness and along there.
I did it in 15mins and still never made it.
Raging.
But i did see Kirsty at night time and we watched 90210 coz we are solid. <3
I hope today will be better.

P.s Its taken me since maybe 3am to set my blog like this so I hope everyone likes it.

Shnit.

2009-02-23T08:50:00.002Z

Another day missed, nevermind.
The worst part is, is that i was on it for ages yesterday taking out all the pictures and left alligning all my posts, which took an age.
Anyway, i think i have stopped caring if i miss one now.
It is monday morning and it feels like i wasted the weekend.
But then again, everyday is the weekend for me right now.
If i had a calendar, everyday on it would be a saturday.
It sounds good but its not.
Speaking of calendars, has anyone else got the new Jade Goody one? Mine only goes up to march?
Wierd.
God, even i found that to be tasteless.

I wish...

2009-02-21T20:58:00.007Z

I would give my right testicle if i understood the game on the very first demo of the playstation 1 called Kurushi.
I thought that maybe after growing older I would understand it but no...
I failed miserably.
Devastated.
If anyone knows or remembers the game let me know.

Wow.

2009-02-20T13:23:00.007Z

I watched a film called "21 Grams" last night.
Apparently people lose 21 grams of weight the instant you die.
Supposedly its your "soul" leaving your body.
Nonetheless, the film was amazing.
Benicio Del Torro and Sean Penn delivered amazing performances as expected and Naomi Watts had a semi convincing role although very poor acting at key parts in the movie.
But definately worth a watch.

Anyway,
I would love to remake Frank Warrens "Post Secreet". For anyone that doesnt know what i mean:

www.postsecretcommunity.com

The only problem this faces is that it is a total rip off and even of i did do it, id would get very little response.
But this is here so if you would like to participate then do something similar to whats on that site and send it to me via email : jay2day@hotmail.co.uk

Awkward.

2009-02-19T18:11:00.005Z

How shit is it when you bump into someone in the street and once you have got the chat you part ways.
Only, you dont.
You walk off in the same direction as each other and then you have to try and either walk slower than them or speed up.
Nightmare.
So anyways, i reckon it is about time to move onto another interactive blog.
But i have to admit i am kinda struggling to think of a topic thats not too similar to my last one.
I will ponder on it for another day and also would appreciate any ideas.
:)

I hate you.

2009-02-18T17:47:00.009Z

If you still use Internet Explorer.
People. Get with the program. Mozilla Firefox is the way foreward.
There are many reasons why it its so much better. Visual and accessibility to name a few.
I may be wrong because ive not used Internet Explorer in...ever, but i bet that you can't listen to the song that I embeded into the webpage.
So come on people.
http://www.mozilla.com/en-US/firefox/

Im convinced.

2009-02-17T21:52:00.005Z

That Mars Planets are the greatest chocolate sweet ever.

Partner in certain crimes.

2009-02-16T18:01:00.006Z

If you have a youtube account then subscribe :
http://www.youtube.com/user/stuartmoffatDOTcom

If you don't have a youtube account then why not make one?
Won't do you any harm.

Content.

2009-02-15T16:54:00.004Z

This is my 50th post :)
I was going to go into an elaborate explanation of why this makes me happy but i wont.
I will just say that im grateful of all the feedback ive gotten and will try to keep going (y).
So, i had dinner last night with Kirsty. It was a good laugh. That was our 3rd Valentines day as a couple and i am almost certain things are even stronger with us than what they were at the start.
Ive got a film on download just now. "Slumdog Millionaire" or something like that.
Sounded pretty decent and i hear it has anwar from the original skins cast.
Anyway,
Scotland lost the rugby yesterday but our next game is against Italy@ Murrayfield.
Mon the Scots.

ValentineShmallenpine.

2009-02-14T16:57:00.005Z

Love.
Some people get it,
For some its just a glove that just never fitted.
For me its just a pain in the ass,
But im addicted to the taste of hoping it can last.

Im going for dinner soon :)
Happy Valentines day everyone.
<3

Friday13th.

2009-02-13T13:04:00.006Z

That's what today is :S
I'm gonna have a lovely day though.
Nothing can stop me from feeling happy right now.
Well im sure there are some things, but you know what i mean.
A boring friday night in this week though.
Not happy.
Got my haircut!
Bye bye fringe, its wierd.
I have had one for 3years!
But its all good.